Monday, August 22, 2005

And your point is???

So, here we am over at the camper place, getting a walk-thru with Mike, the service man. He's showing us how to light the water heater, turn on the fridge and what all the buttons and gadgets do inside the camper. Gary asks all pertinent questions and I'm standing there with all this info swirling in my head. I know Gary understood everything Mike said because the first time we went camping, he had no problems remembering how to do any of it. Myself on the other hand, could only remember that the camper should be level for everything to work properly. I thought I understood that the gray water holding tank was for the sinks and shower and the black water tank was for the toilet. So, needless to say when he was showing us the outside shower, I said to him "Now, when your taking a shower here, this would go into the gray water tank?" He looked at me very strangely and Gary started snort-chuckling (I HATE THAT). "Uh.. no, ma'am" he said "It would go on the ground. You see, ma'am, there is no drain here." And then he lost it, laughing too. I could feel the redness and blushing traveling up my cheeks and there stood Gary laughing like a hyena at me. "ok Mike, just get on with your little instructions and please forget what I just said" I thought. Gary put his arm around me, "Oh boy hun, the guys in service are going to get some mileage out of this!"

One time when I was working at the cable office, a lady brought her converter box in to return. This box looked like in was kept in a filthy septic, not in her living room. The box reeked of cigarette smoke, was covered in an inch of dust and has some sticky substance on it that I don't even want to know what IT was. I asked her to leave it on the counter and come over to my desk for her receipt. One of the technicians happened to be strolling through the office a couple minutes later. He glanced at the converter box on the counter and said "Wow - look at that box. Can you even imagine what the inside of that person's house must look like?" I nervously kept writing out the receipt, not daring to look at the woman. I just knew she was going to flip out on him. "Sheri!" he said a little louder, because he must've thought I didn't hear him. "Have you seen this box? This is the most disgusting thing. I can't even believe someone would have this in their house!" "Thanks Bruce' I said "I'll check it in a minute." I glanced at the woman. Her face was red. The reddest face I'd ever seen. "Wow!" he kept painfully saying. "I hope the person who had this doesn't get their deposit back because it's going to take a while to clean this. Jesus, I can't believe a person would be this filthy." I gave him the pleading eyes, just shut your mouth look but he dumbly continued on. "I would probably puke if I had to even go into a house that something like this came out of. I can't believe the person didn't die of embarrassment when they carried that box in here!" Finally, I had the receipt written and handed to the woman. She took it and hurriedly left. I turned on Bruce. "I can't believe you just kept talking and going on and on! That woman was the one who turned that box in! Didn't you see me looking at you to shut up? You're lucky she didn't rip you a new one!" He was totally mortified and embarrassed at himself but told me he couldn't help it. The words just kept coming out. That sometimes can happen when you're not in on something and everyone else around you is.

Well, the good thing out of this is that I hope she went home and cleaned her house or wherever it was that box came from.

4 comments:

Sandi said...

You know this is horrid to say, but after the first story I kept thinking, 'Here's your sign.' :)
Now the second one, I laughed silly at!! Some men are extremely obtuse.

. said...

OMG>..I laughed so hard. The last time we went camping I was complaining to the guys next to us that we didn't use a water hose anymore because our faucet didnt' work. We just alwasy kept our tank full. He said he would try to fix it for us. He hooked it it and walked in and pushed the handle. Water started spraying out. Hmmmm...How was I supposed to know that on a camper it was bass-ackwards?? doi!

melodyann said...

i bet my house looks like hers.. in fact, maybe that was ME at the counter? nah, i would have told that guy to fuck off...

Sue said...

Ej went on a reception call for "snowy pictures". He felt really bad when he asked the lady for some windex and paper towels. He told me later it looked like
the screen had never been cleaned. After he cleaned the screen, she said "oh my, that's a beautiful picture now, thank you!" He said she didn't seem embarrassed at all, just amazed. Just goes to show you....